There is too much expectation...
From Todaycollegetour
People asked me what I liked. I don’t know. They assume that because I’m me, I should know everything about myself. Totally wrong! People told me I worked too hard. Really? I don’t think so. I wish I have time for myself but I don’t. So that’s why I need to spend time doing something else. Families and friends are important to me but they are not here. They are not with me. They are always somewhere else. Yeah, you’d say the internet or the phone helps. Does it really? My cousin chats with me, cleans his room, talks to his roommate, tries to study. I suppose that’s a great way to connect with people. I can text someone but s/he would never know what I need. It would only be a waste of money.
I tried to be studying and be independent. People said I’m too distant. I don’t know what they want. Do they want me to study or do they want me to socialize? And then if I have bad grades, they always say ‘coz I’m not working hard enough. There is too much expectation you know. I don’t know how people deal with it. I don’t even write diary anymore. Not enough time. Is this what a college experience is about? Being independent and studious and being blamed for not socializing enough?
Huh, and what’s the problem with being virtuous and ethical and right? It seems that everyone nowadays is concerned that something must be done right. No, you must hire more Asian Americans or African Americans so our workforce is diverse. No, you must not throw your water bottle in the trash because it will take forever to disintegrate. No, you must not give your cousin a hand in choosing a career. Let her do it on her own. What’s wrong with all of these? Why can’t people live peacefully together? I don’t care if you’re Jewish or Catholic or Buddhist, as long as you accept other people’s view, too, everything will be fine. People are too concerned with what’s wrong. Why don’t they just concentrate on doing the right and reasonable things?
And what’s wrong with the media? I can’t stand it. Every day you hear about auto accidents or some weird people having tuplets even though she is unemployed, not married and already have 8 other children under 8. Why can’t the media concentrate on the news, what’s important, not what will make headlines and money? Geez, we are living in a world full of bad things. I don’t know if I would want to live in it or not…
